


Back at the Lab

by fancyboots



Category: Swamp Thing (TV 2019)
Genre: Character Analysis, Dr Arcane, Dr Holland, F/M, God I'm tired, Human!Alec, I have a busy day tomorrow, I should probably add more useful tags, I was at the 800 wc telling myself to wrap it up, I'm Sorry, I'm going to look back on this in two days and hate everything, Marais, Romance, also I really do love swampy, and I have no idea how they'll do things in ep 7, and here we are I guess, and then it just....didn't, before episode 7 au because episode 7 isn't even out yet, but have this anyway before they retcon it, but this is a human alec fic I'm sorry to the swampy fans, dc, directly after episode 6, guess I'll throw that tag here too, hi so this fandom tag has practically zero fics on ao3, it felt too risky writing anything big before ep 7 is out, my attempt at it anyway, please for the love of god save this show you can't give us this and take it away after ten episodes, relationship building, save swamp thing, so I can't wait to critique my own rambling dialogue tomorrow, so it's really mild in this fic I guess, sorry I feel like I'm baiting you there, they're both beautiful, this one really got away from me, this piece was made under the assumption that Alec's not immediately aware of the change, unspoken attraction, why did I have to write this at 1am
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-07
Updated: 2019-07-07
Packaged: 2020-06-24 05:16:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,699
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19716970
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fancyboots/pseuds/fancyboots
Summary: Suddenly changed back to his human self, Alec can't really make sense of it and neither can Abby. And then they talk about stuff.





	Back at the Lab

**Author's Note:**

> AO3 has a severe lack of Swamp Thing (2019) and it is killing me.

Alec froze for a moment, believing he’d heard his old voice.

That can’t be right.

Most likely it was another lapse in memory. The identity shift was growing stronger, and with each passing day he felt the ties to his past weaken. Despite that, some remnant was there keeping him anchored to his old self. There were still moments Alec felt like he was normal again. Like the change had never happened. But they were brief in their passing and became less frequent with time.

Something had Abby stunned though. He watched the spores float in the space around them, barely visible in the dim moonlight seeping through the cabin’s windows. They were gradually dispersing further outwards and drifting elsewhere through the laboratory. The air slowly cleared.

He couldn’t say with confidence what the sprouting flower was, only that it had made him feel slightly lighter than usual. So far each ability this form possessed remained hidden until he found himself using it purely by intuition. Admittedly, that scared him. He wished to understand this form and control it. In his current position, he felt like a leaf tossed around on a rapid.

But to take that next step forward, he knew it would carry him further from his past self. Abby still thought she could help him, but if she couldn’t…

Abby seemed to have regained sense of her surroundings and rubbed each eye. Alec assumed it was dust, or the spores.

“It’s…like…” Abby paused. She knew what she wanted to say but was taking more effort than usual to retrieve words.

Alec frowned, unsure what she was trying to tell him.

“Can you…can you see-” she dropped the sentence to try another, “Look at your hands.”

Shooting her a questioning look, Alec raised his hands and looked at his palms.

Hang on.

He turned them around to look at their backs.

Then he looked up towards Abby.

“This is a dream, right?”

Alec blinked, hearing that old voice of his again. He moved a hand to his neck and felt warm skin.

Abby started walking towards him, talking as she moved, “Possibly,” It didn’t feel like a dream, but there weren’t many other explanations to take its place. “The plant, it released something into the air,” she paused, tilting her head a little as she peered at Alec from a different angle.

“It might be an organic sedative compound. Is…is that right?”

Alec shrugged, “As good a guess as mine.”

Abby slowly walked closer to him.

“…a hallucinogen?”

As she closed the gap between them, Abby raised her hand to Alec’s arm and touched the cloth of his shirt. It felt entirely real.

Alec looked to where she’d placed her hand, then back to Abby’s face. She turned to lock eyes with him, just as surprised as Alec was.

Abby shifted her hand off his arm, hesitated for a moment, then let her palm move to Alec’s cheek with her eyes following the movement. She rested her hand there, feeling the warmth beneath it.

“It feels real.” Her eyes flickered upwards, searching Alec’s face. She tucked her hand back down from his face and took a step back, conscious of how close she had been to him.

Alec broke his glance away from her face and looked down at the floor, putting his hands in his trouser pockets. For a second, he felt jolted at the notion of pockets. It had been a quick minute since he had used pockets.

He was feeling a bit stupid now and took his hands back out of the pockets, opting to let them rest casually on his hips. “We should uh…we should run some tests first perhaps. Check organic material, determine if there’s a change over time.”

Abby nodded fervently, “Yeah, yes definitely.”

Alec nodded slightly to himself “Probably best if we stay focused on the bigger problems for n-“

He was cut off by Abby, after she’d swiftly closed the distance and wrapped her arms around his shoulders in an embrace. She rested her head on his right shoulder and closed her eyes, breathing out as she took in the warm feeling of the hug.

Caught off-guard, Alec’s arms were still hovering in front with hands splayed in empty space. He moved his right arm against Abby’s back, mostly to re-balance himself before he fell backwards. Then he moved his other arm to her back, and slowly let his head dip down to rest against Abby’s shoulder. Alec closed his eyes. He hadn’t realised how much he’d wanted to hold Abby, the thought constantly dancing around but always dismissed. In truth he had made extra effort to avoid her touch, hoping to shield her just that little bit more from his uncomfortable reality.

But right now, there was just warmth and comfort for Alec to feel. And the familiarity of his old self was cascading back again.

He felt Abby shift her head slightly, as her arms loosened from his neck. Alec opened his eyes and reset his senses, before casually parting from the embrace with her.

Abby rested her hands on his shoulders briefly, then let them fall to her sides. She stepped back and clasped her hands together loosely, looking down for a moment. Out of embarrassment or regret, or contemplation perhaps. Alec wasn’t sure.

“I would have done that sooner, but it’s as if you were keeping a distance. Even after I found out who you were, it’s like you were…I don’t know, ashamed?”

Abby paced towards the windows, the moonlight settling down serenely on her face. Her arms were folded, and she looked out the windows, focusing on nothing.

For a moment Alec reflected on himself, trying to find an answer for her. He hadn't really dwelt on it much, the habit she described happened naturally. It was painfully obvious in his own mind even if Abby failed to see it. 

“When everything changed I took some time adjusting. I mean even now I’m still adjusting to it.”

Abby turned towards Alec, and as he shifted to look back at her she caught his eyes. She paid them more attention this time and noticed they were heavy, tired. It was his old body, his old face. But he lacked the energy she remembered from their first day together.

Alec walked over to the shelves of flasks and beakers, then reached out a hand to shift one in its place absentmindedly. The solution inside it was one of the chlorophyll extractions from some other unremarkable swamp plant. He couldn’t remember what he’d been planning to use it for. Not that it mattered now.

“But early on I’d decided it was easier to keep my distance. Avoid other people, try and…figure out whatever this was…by myself.”

He left the flask alone and put his hands in his pockets. It didn’t feel so unusual now at least.

“There’s this apprehension that whatever it is infecting me or mutating me…it’s not something I can just change back. Despite this -” Alec gestured a wide circle around his front with one hand, indicating himself, “- there’s a pretty solid chance this thing can’t be reversed.”

Abby looked to Alec. She appeared as if she wanted to interrupt him, but she stood there with her arms crossed and waited for him to finish.

Pausing to collect his thoughts, Alec dropped his hand back into the empty pocket. He turned back to the shelves piled with glass containers. Empty, full, few and far between. Work he'd been in the middle of, wasting away in his absence. 

“If that’s the case," he continued, "Well…can’t lose what you don’t have.”

“Alright.”

He pulled his focus away from the shelves and faced Abby, her snapped response breaking him from his thoughts. There was a look of worry on her face that he was growing accustomed to. Maybe that proved his point, she needed to walk away before she was dragged further into his own problem. She didn’t deserve a share in his struggle.

“I understand it better now. And if you feel like Alec Holland is slipping away, or…being replaced by whatever this thing is…I’m sorry that you’re feeling conflicted because of it. I wish I could just lift that burden from you. Finding a cure is my best shot at that.”

She paused, taking a breath. Abby didn’t want to draw attention to it, but she knew just as well there might never be a cure. Regardless of whatever they’d both hoped for, Alec might be right in his mindset by the end of it all. Abby set the thought aside and switched back to what she was trying to say.

“Maybe that’s the point of this though. The reason you look and sound and feel like your old self right now. Maybe it’s not real or maybe you’ll change back. Something triggered those spores to emerge.”

Abby walked over to Alec. She took his hand in her own and held it there between them, palm side up.

“Maybe it was that other side of you trying to remind yourself. That you’re still there. You’re still Alec.”

She looked up to him, hoping maybe this was the time he would trust her on it.

Alec looked back at her, lips parted as if he were about to dispute what she said but left it at the door last second.

Feeling the weight of their conversation settle, Abby folded Alec’s hand closed and released it. She turned around and paced back casually, making her way towards the window and peering out at the swamp below. Moonlight reflected against the water’s surface and a fog swept across and between the old drooping trees lining the banks.

“Just without the designer flip-flops this time,” she added.

When Alec focused back to Abby by the window, her face was partially obscured by her hair. She turned back towards him, smiling gently.

Alec looked down at his shoes, then made a show of checking out his boots. “Yeah not my first choice, but they’ll do for now.” A slight smirk appeared on his face, and Abby laughed softly to herself.


End file.
